18th Birthday – A Reminder That I’m Not Just Another Year Older

Birthdays represent a lot of things. It can mean you’re a year older. It can mean that you’re still alive after said years. It can mean a passing of time. And it can also mean that you can now do certain things, I mean, I’m legal now!! But more than that, it can also mean that it’s time to make a bigger ripple in the world. For me, my birthday this year meant all that plus so much more.

I’m really happy that I got to spend these last few days, including my birthday, with friends who made the last few days such surreal experience. There’s just nothing like eating in a buffet, watching a suspense movie, talking about life, playing basketball with your friends on your birthday. I mean, no matter how absurd or nonsensical we get in our conversations, it’s always a good and euphoric time when you’re with your friends. You can’t help but feel invigorated as you laugh your heart out in almost every single word. I definitely couldn’t have asked for anything more especially after the tiring past few weeks. Laughter with friends truly is the best medicine to anything!

There’s no dull moment with these guys! Super thankful to have spent my birthday with them!

I honestly can’t believe I’m a year older already. Time really does fly by quickly. I’m finally 18 yet it feels as if I’m still a child. I was expecting to feel radically different on the day of my birthday. Yet I realized that change doesn’t happen in one day and that this 18th year of mine, I’ve already changed so much.

Tired of School? Tired of all the responsibilities? Don’t stop, the Story Ain’t Over!

The last few days have been really tiring. After finally taking the SAT reasoning test for a second time last Saturday, I thought I’d finally be able to take a break. Guess what hits me? HELL WEEK. It’s the last two weeks of the Third Quarter already and everything is starting to pile up.

It’s crazy how you barely have time to breathe. There’s always something more to do. There’s always something that I should be doing. All the responsibilities, duties and tasks are really building up once again. Or am I just overwhelmed? How do I balance all these?

Having Fun, Overshooting and Why Things Eventually Work Out For the Better!

It’s finally the end of another week of Senior Year. This week was honestly one of the toughest weeks I had to go through.

Several times during this week, I felt really down and unsure if what I was doing was worth it. It was really tough and stressful trying to assiduously catch up with all the lessons and also give ample time to my extra-curricular activities.

I got so caught up in my endless to do list, my college application, my school responsibilities and extra-curricular activities that I forgot the most important thing. The thing that matters most this Senior Year of mine. I forgot that Senior Year should be fun!

I was starting to become obsessed with trying to do so much that I was losing sight of my goals and my values. Everything was happening so fast that I was changing along with it. I was getting engulfed by all the requirements, deadlines, responsibilities and things that I had to do. I’m glad that the week is over and I have this chance to slow down a bit and go back to being ME.

One of the better things that happened to me this week though was my making it to the Xavier debate team that will be going to Thailand to compete in the ASWDC (Asian Schools World Debating Championship). I wasn’t initially part of the team since I was only able to attend one tryout day since I had to go to Singapore. I really wanted to be part of the team though and luckily one of the members backed out and a slot for me was opened.

I’m really excited for this event especially since it will be my first international competition where I’ll be representing my school. I may not be that good a debater yet but I will make sure that I use this month before the competition to diligently prepare myself so that I can make the most out of this experience!

The start of the week may have been a bit shaky but things really do work out for the better. Just yesterday, I finally got to meet my CAMP (College Admissions Mentors for Peers) mentor. I’m really lucky to have a guy who studied in Yale and was also a former Xaverian, as my mentor. In the 2 hours we spent chatting, I learned so much about the study abroad process and why I should give it a shot.

I wholeheartedly appreciate and support what the CAMP organization is doing!

No Such Thing As A Wasted Moment

I was honestly a bit burned out after all the hardcore marathon review sessions for the SAT

It’s been a week since I last blogged and this past week after taking the SAT was really a chance to start exploring again, preparing for Senior Year and also taking time off to reflect. To be honest, after taking the SAT, I felt really relieved but at the same time a bit burned out after all the marathon review sessions I went through the past month just to put myself in the best position to get a good score. I really needed this week where I had to cut back on studying and I just had to slow down a bit since I was probably reaching max speed already and I wouldn’t have wanted to go overdrive yet at this stage.

The ball that showed me how round the world is…in other words, you can be on top one second, then at the very bottom the next!

Aside from having my energy at a low after the SAT, I also had to face the decision this past week whether or not to go through surgery and have my ACL reconstructed. Previously, although I was really ambivalent about going through the process, I was all set to get the surgery over with however after long talks with a few doctors and also with my parents. However, I ultimately decided not to go through with the surgery for several reasons. First of all, my growth plates were still slightly open according to an X-ray. Second, even if I went through surgery, I probably still wouldn’t be able to return to the court this senior year of mine for it takes 6-8 months of rehab before I can go back to ball sports so the hassle of going through the process was looking more and more tedious. Third, the surgery process is really complicated and there are several risks that I deemed unnecessary since either way, basketball isn’t my future career.  So with all those uncertainties and ambivalence, I think I made the right choice not go through with it for now.

Sometimes, we just need to reflect upon life….

These last few days though, I couldn’t help but feel nostalgic as I weighed my options, talked to the doctor, discussed with my parents and in the process, looked back at my basketball journey and everything I went through the past years. I couldn’t help but shed a few tears and think about the what ifs. What if I decided to spend my time on something else? What if I was more open minded and not closed up in my own small world because of basketball? I was actually ranting at my parents how I wasted my teenage years so immersed and engrossed in basketball only to end up tearing my ACL. However, this is life. You can’t have everything and sometimes, things just won’t go your way. Those years I spent playing basketball seemed like such a waste but then I realized I learned so much from the journey. It truly was a humbling experience that taught me a myriad of things about life. Like the saying goes, “It’s not about the destination; it’s about the JOURNEY!”

To honest though, I regret alienating myself from almost everything and everyone during the previous years just to focus on basketball. The past is the past though, and all I can do is learn from my mistakes and look forward. This is what I’ve been doing the past few days, looking ahead and trying to prepare myself for one hell of a ride, SENIOR YEAR.

The past few days, I’ve been contacting friends, working on projects for my Committee and Club and at the same time, reading as much books as I can. Aside from that, I also recently tried out for the Debate Team. A lot of these things I probably would be too busy to do if I was still part of the basketball team. It’s truly amazing how the saying, “When one door closes, another opens.” In my case however, I’ve come to realize that there are so much more doors out there that I can open. Maybe injuring my knee truly was a blessing in disguise from God and everything will work out in the end. Right now, I’m just thankful to God for all the blessings He has given me and hopefully, this is just the start of more amazing things to come!

There will be really high moments and there will be super low moments, but I’ve come to realized that there’s no such a thing as a wasted moment for no matter what happens, there’s always a silver lining behind it. We may not realize it in the moment itself, but as long as we believe and are open to the possibilities, things will eventually work out for the better. 

-DOitChoco

When The World Falls On Your Knee…..Life Still Goes On!

Life never fails to surprise me! I will never understand the complex and abstruse nature of this world, and how one week can be the time of my life then the following week ends up being one of the worst ever.

After the last day of Chem Camp last week, I honestly felt so accomplished and happy with how things were turning out for me. Then in a blink of an eye, the world goes upside down. Obviously, to begin with, there was no more vibrantly waking up each day knowing that you’d get to see friends who just make life seems so surreal in Chem Camp.

To add to that, I’ve been really having a hard time regaining the focus, edge and passion that I used to have for basketball. I wasn’t even sure anymore if basketball was the thing for me. I hit rock bottom and really had to think and reflect as to what I should do. As I looked back, I remembered my freshman and sophomore year in high school when I was really dedicated and motivated to become the best player I could be. I’d spend countless of hours working on my game, watching game film and even going on a strict diet to build up my body.

A year of sporadic playing time during my Junior Year and a desire to explore life outside of basketball took away from my inner drive. Aside from that, SAT review and Chem Camp was also taking a toll on me.

I needed to get back the spark and a heart to heart talk with my dad and a day of reflecting and recalling everything I’ve done for basketball got me back on track. I regained my exuberance and I was ready to give it my all and leave it all on the court especially since I’m an incoming senior already.

I realized that nothing worth it in life is easy and if I wanted to be an integral part of the team in my last year in Xavier, I’d have to regain the unmatched motor, dedication and zeal I used to have.

The plan was in place and I was really going at every drill in practice with my 110%. Then as we were finishing practice with our usual scrimmage, everything fell apart. One drive to the basket, one hop step, one pop and BOOM, I felt as if the world fell on my knee. It was the first time that I felt such excruciating pain and here I am having a hard time even walking from my room to the bathroom. In a blink of an eye, everything that I had worked for in the last 8 years had disappeared as I lay on the floor shouting in pain.

Everything happened so quickly that I’m not quite sure what to feel right now, but like what my coach said, “Stay positive.” I truly believe in the fact that everything in life happens for a reason. Right now, I ask myself, “Why does this have to happen to me? and why NOW?” Hopefully, weeks or months from now, I understand why.

One things I’ve learned is that life never fails to surprise and leave a lot of us dumb-founded. I may have hit rock-bottom but things could be worse. Looking at things from a different perspective, maybe this is a blessing in disguise. Maybe, I just have to find the silver lining in this.

Like my favorite quote and motto in life states, “Life is what you make it.” This may seem like a setback but it will only be that way if I choose to make it so or I could choose to see this injury as a learning experience and just make the most out of my time off the court.

The uncertainty right now kills especially because of the fact that I can barely move my right knee anymore. I’ll be heading to the doctor later to find out what exactly is the condition of my knee. No matter what happens though, I’ll just have to accept my fate for it’s not like I can change the past; I can only learn from it and move on for LIFE GOES ON!

-DOitChoco

*editors note: David found out that he tore his anterior cruciate ligament (ACL) an injury that would sideline him for the rest of the season